The Woman’s Guiding, Not Determining, Function in a Home: a Case Study on Ruskin’s Tactics in Sesame and Lilies

The Woman’s Guiding, not Determining, Function in a Home:

A Case Study on Ruskin’s Tactics in Sesame and Lilies

     In the excerpt from Sesame and Lilies, Ruskin delivers a speech to reinforce what he sees as the clearly distinct domains of the two genders by putting forth the claim that the woman, though whose role is to guide and rule the home, should remain complementary and supportive to the role of the man in his model of a home. He starts out by placing the roles of the man and the woman side by side, without comparing. The man takes the role of “the doer, the creator, the discoverer, the defender,” (77) providing the security and drive to the Home while the role of the woman is for “sweet ordering, arrangement and decision,” (77) bringing “Praise” to the home. He then gradually shifts his focus to describing his picture of the ideal woman, setting forth the high standards for the woman through the use of extreme images so perfect that at times seem impossible to achieve by mortal beings. By presenting this ideal portrait, Ruskin attempts to convince his audience of the woman’s guiding, yet wifely subjected, function.

     It may seem that Ruskin is an advocate for gender equality when he explicitly states at the beginning of the excerpt: “We are foolish, and without excuse foolish, in speaking … as if they (the sexes) could be compared in similar things.” (77) However, his description of the roles of the man and the woman clearly shows that he sets different standards for each gender. He leaves more leeway for the man while establishing extremely high, and probably impossible, standards for the woman. On one hand, the man is allowed for “the failure, the offence, the inevitable error” (77); on the other hand, the woman must be “incapable of error.” (78) Ruskin’s self-contradiction goes further with the use of extreme language and many superlatives, especially and noticeably, only when describing the high standards set forth for the woman. “To fulfill this (woman’s true place and power), she must – as far as one can use such terms of a human creature – be incapable of error? So far as she rules, all must be right, or nothing is. She must be enduringly, incorruptibly good; instinctively, infallibly wise.” (78) These two consecutive sentences, though seemingly similar in describing the ideal image of the woman, bring to the table contradictory effects. While one sentence speaks highly of the role and qualities of the woman in a home, the other sentence, on the other hand, proves that the woman is in fact incapable of fulfilling this role. Through the analysis of this seemingly paradox in his portrait of the woman, I argue that Ruskin, in fact, uses one side of the paradox as a leverage to push forward the idea, hidden in the other side, that the woman’s function is never to rule.

     The paradox is first seen in the question: “But do you not see that, to fulfill this, she must – as far as one can use such terms of a human creature – be incapable of error?” “Incapable of error” is an extreme phrase, suggesting perfection, something no human is capable of. Despite perfection being an extreme idea, Ruskin’s use of the word “incapable” suggests he is describing a mortal since only mortal can be capable or incapable of doing something. If instead he were describing a God, it would be along the line “free from error.” Moreover, the word “fulfill” in the same sentence reflects that this being, the woman, has been given (by God) a predetermined mission, a role to fulfill, suggesting that she is in fact just a mortal being obeying God. It is thus clear that Ruskin is fully aware he is forcing these qualities into a human being and not God since God can do whatever he wants without the responsibility of fulfilling a mission; Ruskin’s God defines the roles for mortals. Therefore, we see that Ruskin’s question questions the absurd contradiction presented in his own portrait that the woman, though just a human being, is destined to fulfill such an impossible role within a home.